


Of Breakfast in Bed and Cunnilingus.

by kmi85



Series: Oblivious Jen [1]
Category: Dead To Me (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:20:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24639025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kmi85/pseuds/kmi85
Summary: Lorna has a bone to pick with Jen about Judy.Let's say post season 1, during/after season 2.Pre-relationship. i.e., two idiots in love playing at being gal pals.
Relationships: Judy Hale/Jen Harding
Series: Oblivious Jen [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1802323
Comments: 12
Kudos: 102





	Of Breakfast in Bed and Cunnilingus.

It was a simple thing really. Go to the witch’s house, rescue her kids from her bony hands and drive home so they could all rest for the night. But no. No, it couldn’t be. It just could not fucking be. And now Jen was stuck, stood by Lorna’s door arguing with the vile bitch while Judy and the kids waited in the car.

“Ted wasn’t even cold in the ground when you brought _her_ in into your home.”

“What the fuck are you going on about Lorna?”

“Oh, you just couldn’t wait to move-in with your lover and introduce her to my boys. Ted’s boys!”

“What the hell? What the ever fucking fuck is your problem?”

“Out with the old, in with the new! You never loved him. How could you? You don’t have it in you. Months later and you are all settled down with a homeless con artist. Henry tells me she’s even sharing your bed. Teddy’s bed!”

“Oh for fuck’s sake Lorna. You are fucking unstable. What do you wanna hear? That we have wild sex throughout the house and have christened every fucking surface? That she makes me breakfast in bed and then I eat her out in _Ted’s_ bed to thank her? That on my fucking nightstand there’s only lube, sex toys and our trusty strap-on so we can fucking fuck each other all fucking night long if we fucking want to? Fuck! Fucking take your pills woman. Or don’t. I don’t fucking care. Have a fucking unpleasant night, you witch.”

***

Once they had all gotten home and the kids had retired for the night, Judy poked the bear as the bear served two glasses of wine. 

“So… it seems like I have been missing out on a few, very important, very crucial benefits that I’m gonna cash in.”

Jen scrunched up her face, “What?”

“I brought you breakfast in bed this morning.” Judy said waggling her eyebrows.

“Oh for – fuck’s sake. You heard all that?”

“I think the whole block heard it. Including the kids.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake. Oh shit, no wonder they could not look me in the eye.”

“Yeah, they are traumatized. Our non-existent sex life scared the shit out of them.”

“Yeah. Shit. “

“So – I’m cashing it in, or rather cashing four in, if memory serves right.”

“You are ridiculous.” Jen scoffed.

“You are in luck. I shaved today. It’s all smooth down there. Well, not completely smooth. I like a little hair down there.”

“Ew. Stop.” Jen said blushing.

“What, you don’t have to eat me out. I can eat you out. I’m really good at that.” Judy winked.

“Judy-”

“And I guess we can get a strap-on tomorrow. Or two. I do have this crazy vibe you are gonna love.”

“Jude-“

“But I am definitely cashing in my breakfast in bed followed by some court mandated cunnilingus.” Judy made a face, “or rather, how about you eat me out first and then we have breakfast? Does that sound good?”

“Judy!” Jen laughed. “You are fucking ridiculous you know that?”

“Hey, I’m not joking. Offer still stands. And I can eat your butthole now since I am not seeing anyone.”

“You are nasty,"

Judy gasped and fanned herself.

"Oh, that's it. Talk dirty to me."

Jen laughed again.

"Gross. You are gross.”

“Oh, but you love me. So, so, much.”

Jen shook her head and raised her glass to her mouth to hide her smile.

“Not at the moment, you weirdo, no.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading and/or leaving a comment!


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